Adoption Class: The Room Surrounded by Kleenex & The Search for Our Queen

Casey and I were one of the first couples to enter the room and everywhere we looked there were boxes of Kleenex.

I had grabbed a few of my own tissues before walking out the door.

I knew it was going to be emotional for these two days of the Adoption Education Seminar.

As other couples filed their way into the room, I quietly watched them.

I wondered, "What was their story?"

I knew ours.

On May 19th, 2009, Casey and I would be married for eight years. No children.

We went to doctors to be tested. Was it because of me? Was it because of Casey? Was there any reason?

The doctors had nothing to say to us. To them, we seemed fine.

I almost wished there was something said because then there would be an opportunity to fix it.

We had wanted kids since the beginning so eight years seemed like an eternity.

While at the home of Casey's parents, his father mentioned adoption and how some little one may be waiting for us through that way.

Something burned within me.

On the drive home, I told Casey. He said he felt it, too.

Yes, we had heard the stories of people who became pregnant once they started the adoption process. That was not the reason we started it.

We felt that regardless of how we had children--even if we became pregnant along the way--that we would still pursue the adoption process.

So here we were--at this two-day Adoption Education Seminar.

Many things were shared. Many things were learned.

Every so often I flashed to the Colombian story The Gardener's Wife.

In this story you have two women who desperately want to have children: the Gardener's Wife and the Queen.

The Queen is able to have children but, unbeknown to her, the two jealous older sisters, act as midwives and switch her children for either a dog, a cat, or a stick.

Every time the Queen must confront the King. What must he think.

But the Queen never says anything. Instead, her emotions are revealed through a sigh, a grieving groan, or a silent tear.

The Queen does not know that somewhere beyond the boundaries of her kingdom is where her children have been placed. Or at least placed as to how the Winding River carried the floating wooden boxes.

These boxes come--one by one--when the Gardener's Wife is in her deepest despair. She and her husband see these babes as blessings from above.

It was meant to be.

It was a gift.

Warmth and love returns to the heart of the Gardener's Wife. Not that she was cold and unfeeling before, but a certain side of her was unable to function until this moment.

Meanwhile, the Queen is in despair. How could she have these children and yet not have them? What curse had come upon her? When would she have the family she so desired?

Then, as can only happen as time passes, the Queen sees the beautiful garden kept by the Wife. She sees the oldest child. Her child. Something stirs inside her but she does not understand. . .that she is looking upon her own child.

Though, the Queen is filled with a burning. She feels three things are missing and ask the Gardener's Wife if her three children could go on a quest for these things.

More adventures happen but it is not until the quest is achieved that the Queen returns to the home of the Gardener's Wife. The two mothers realize that the three children are their children.

The mother who brought them in to the world and the mother who taught them how to live in the world were together.

And the children loved them both.

Then I thought to my life.

Somewhere was a Queen--the birth mother--for the child we wish to have in our home.

The Adoption Education Seminar shared how there was a time when the process is "my baby" to "our baby" to "your baby".

My eyes were opened more so to this process when we had the Birth Mother Panel. This was a part that was open to our family and friends.

I was thrilled--and tears formed--when Casey's parents were there along with three of my sisters-in-law with spouses.

Then, Holly Robison was there.

Holly would harmonize during the telling of The Gardener's Wife and it was special for her to be there. We both thought of the story as we heard the moving stories from the birth mothers.

We hugged.

Then I turned to my husband.

We knew that out there was the Queen, our Queen.

Until we tell again,

Rachel Hedman

Professional Storyteller

Former Co-Chair of Youth, Educators, and Storytellers Alliance (2005-2008)

Tel: (801) 870-5799
Email: info@rachelhedman.com

URL: http://www.rachelhedman.com

How-To Blog: http://storytellingadventures.blogspot.com

Performance Blog: http://familyfamine.blogspot.com
Other places to find me: Twitter, YouTube, Facebook, LinkedIn, Professional Storyteller

Unable to Hear: Time Still Chimes Forth

As a storyteller, sometimes the mouth is cherished more so than the ears.

Foolish me.

Besides, my story buddy, Holly Robison, is always saying, "I've got a nose for a tale, so lend me an ear!"

In any case, it was a relief to have our practice in-person after last week's practice over the telephone with Holly.

She harmonizes two songs in the Colombian story The Gardener's Wife and the phone does not give justice to the singing. I could barely hear her so to know if all went well.

Yet, even with our in-person practice today, it seemed that something was wrong with my left ear.

It was as if someone had stuffed a sock into my ear.

My schedule was so intense that I thought, "I have no time to see a doctor!"

But I worried.

Strange that I comforted myself with, "My right ear works fine."

I searched online and searched for my symptoms. One link told me to hum. If I sounded louder from the side of the clogged ear, then most likely it was not a permanent hearing loss.

I sounded louder.

I did not feel an urgent need to see the doctor then.

As soon as Holly and I finished practicing, I headed to the Ruth Vine Taylor Library to meet with my Utah Storytelling Guild friends Carol Esterreicher and Jan C. Smith.

Carol, Jan, and I meet every 3rd Thursday to improve either the development of stories or the development of our story business.

To no one's surprise, I wanted to practice a story for the premiere.

As I told The Gardener's Wife with Holly, I chose to tell The Changeling with Carol and Jan.

Though, stewing inside my brain (besides an ear problem) was when I discovered that the same night as my Family Famine: Hunger for Love premiere was another storytelling concert in the neighboring town despite my efforts to avoid such a scheduling conflict.

My frustration must have merged into my telling of the Irish tale as Jan commented how much dark this story seemed.

She mentioned two moments that made it dark:
1. Mrs. Lynch and the way child abuse was alluded to in relation to her son and how Mrs. Sullivan responds
2. Mrs. Sullivan and the choice whether to send a red-hot poker down the changeling's throat in order to receive her baby back

Knowing that The Changeling would be the first story told at the premiere, Jan expected more of a "ha-ha" kind of story.

There were a few moments of humor, but it had more a creepy or ghostly feel than anything else.

I had two decisions before me:
1. Would I listen to this reaction and lighten the mood of the story?
2. Would I see the doctor to be able to hear. . .properly?

Time would have the answer for time still chimes forth whether or not I choose to listen.

Until we tell again,

Rachel Hedman

Professional Storyteller

Former Co-Chair of Youth, Educators, and Storytellers Alliance (2005-2008)

Tel: (801) 870-5799
Email: info@rachelhedman.com

URL: http://www.rachelhedman.com

How-To Blog: http://storytellingadventures.blogspot.com

Performance Blog: http://familyfamine.blogspot.com
Other places to find me: Twitter, YouTube, Facebook, LinkedIn, Professional Storyteller

Postcards & Letters: Temptation to Give to Everyone

I have several phases of sending out Family Famine: Hunger for Love postcards as every month --and lately every day--I have more contacts.

As I have only so many postcards, then I must decide who would be my strongest candidates for supporting my venture.

If my budget would support it, I would love to give a postcard to everyone in the world.

Then that would be throwing my Communications Marketing education at Brigham Young University in the garbage can.

Today my focus was on the Local Art Councils in Utah as well as the members of the Utah Storytelling Guild.

Though the Local Art Councils received individualized signed postcards, I wrote a letter for each of the USG members. And signed, of course.

I added a postcard within the letter.

I encouraged each USG member to share the postcard with a neighbor, friend, or acquaintance.

I am grateful for everyone's help to spread the word about the premiere.

Until we tell again,

Rachel Hedman

Professional Storyteller

Former Co-Chair of Youth, Educators, and Storytellers Alliance (2005-2008)

Tel: (801) 870-5799
Email: info@rachelhedman.com

URL: http://www.rachelhedman.com

How-To Blog: http://storytellingadventures.blogspot.com

Performance Blog: http://familyfamine.blogspot.com
Other places to find me: Twitter, YouTube, Facebook, LinkedIn, Professional Storyteller

Song Recording: The Stress of It All

Holly Robison, my story buddy for "The Gardener's Wife", could be counted on to determine the right harmony for the two songs within the piece.

She loves singing. . .perhaps more than me!

When she was a seven-year-old, she sang a song about her Dad for a talent show. Time has passed and she has continued this talent by singing with choirs that have toured from the Western States to Germany. Today she is part of The Choral Arts Society of Utah and the We Also Sing, a woman's choir in the Salt Lake valley.

Sometimes it is nerve-striking to sing around her when I reflect on her background.

Then I remember, "Hey, Holly is my friend!" and I am calm again.

Then there are the times when stress gets the better of me.

Holly held her recorder towards me so she could have the songs within "The Gardener's Wife". Since she would be out of town on January 16th, we would have to have practice over the telephone. We would need to have the harmony for the songs done by then.

The tune was still new for the grieving/pleading song as it came together only yesterday. Suddenly I wondered if I would be able to remember. The thought was enough to create a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Again and again I asked for Holly to start the recorder to catch the tunes.

Always something went wrong.

It went so bad that I had to play the recording I made from my mp3 recorder so Holly could make a copy on her recorder.

I promised Holly I would be more confident with the tune by the time it was the premiere.

That was when Holly's normally-smiling-face stared at me seriously and said, "You know you can relax around me."

I thought about what she said.

The recording was made and I knew that in good times or in bad that Holly would be there for me.

Thank you, Holly, for being a wonderful friend!

Until we tell again,

Rachel Hedman

Professional Storyteller

Former Co-Chair of Youth, Educators, and Storytellers Alliance (2005-2008)

Tel: (801) 870-5799
Email: info@rachelhedman.com

URL: http://www.rachelhedman.com

How-To Blog: http://storytellingadventures.blogspot.com

Performance Blog: http://familyfamine.blogspot.com
Other places to find me: Twitter, YouTube, Facebook, LinkedIn, Professional Storyteller

Soundscapes: How a Guitar can Howl like a Wolf

This was the first practice of the "Forsaken Brother" story with guitarist Joshua Payne, and my nerves were on end.

I usually have butterflies in the stomach when I perform, but I had more than usual today.

I would not be alone as Julie Barnson, my story buddy, would also be in the room. That was comforting as she is a long-time storytelling friend. Joshua is still learning about the storytelling world so there is more pressure to be as exceptional as possible.

Luckily, the meeting was called a "practice" so perfection was not required. In fact, this was the place to make mistakes.

While Joshua set up his guitar, I reviewed the French scenes and shared which areas were key for certain sounds from him.

The wolf howls were important to the plot and the wind threaded its way throughout the story.

I was amazed when Joshua demonstrated how his guitar could how like a wolf. He turned some knobs and the eerie sound escaped his instrument.

I had always envisioned having music to enhance the "Forsaken Brother" story, but what I heard surpassed my imaginations.

It was evident that Joshua had done his research before coming to the meeting. He had listened to other stories that merged music with words such as the classic "Peter and the Wolf". Though what we would do was vastly different that than piece, there were techniques that could be drawn from it such as the power of silence or how to not overpower the speaker.

So with less confidence than usual, I told the "Forsaken Brother" story. I attempted to stop after each French scene as Joshua and I decided that each scene could have a different soundscape. My mp3 recorder/microphone caught these moments at the same time of Joshua's recorder.

With all the pauses and word-tumblings, it took 27 minutes to tell! I predicted that the polished story would be between 15-20 minutes. My pacing was slow and words were drawn out so I knew I was on track. Of course, the story must go as long as it must go.

After telling the whole story, Joshua spoke some musical lingo and terminology that was unfamiliar to me.

Here is what we decided after the first time through the story:

• Story would begin and end with the same soundscape though the beginning would be in the major chord while the ending would be in the minor chord
• Pause or silence during the chanting would heighten the mood
• A final howl from the guitar would follow after my last words
• Time may be given for pure music during seasonal changes in the story

I look forward to more practices to see what develops.

Until we tell again,

Rachel Hedman

Professional Storyteller

Former Co-Chair of Youth, Educators, and Storytellers Alliance (2005-2008)

Tel: (801) 870-5799
Email: info@rachelhedman.com

URL: http://www.rachelhedman.com

How-To Blog: http://storytellingadventures.blogspot.com

Performance Blog: http://familyfamine.blogspot.com
Other places to find me: Twitter, YouTube, Facebook, LinkedIn, Professional Storyteller

Premiere Pins: Sticking out in the Crowd

As the "Family Famine: Hunger for Love" premiere will be the Monday after the Timpanogos Storytelling Conference, I will think outside the box on how to advertise.

I had checked to see if I could have a booth, but the conference was limited to the number of tables. They did plan to reserve a table so that storytellers could place their business cards on it. My postcards could go at this table, but it was even questionable if I could have a poster on an easel in case I took too much room.

If it was about the money, I was willing to pay for a table. It seemed the conference did not work in that way.

Since my premiere was not officially connected to the conference, I also could not had a flier in the folder given to all registrants.

I was allowed to give out business cards. If such an act was permitted, then perhaps I could also give out pins that mentioned the premiere on one side and the other side had all the basic information like place, time, tickets, etc.

Friends could help me pass out pins, too.

I would want to make 200 pins due to the attendance I had seen in the past for the Timpanogos Storytelling Conference. In many ways, I had to treat advertising at the conference much as if it was a fringe.

I headed to Hobby Lobby and walked up and down aisles to see what ideas may be triggered on what materials to even use for the pins.

When I came to the unfinished wood aisle, I paused.

I found wooden hearts and tiny bowls. I liked the idea of using wood, though I tossed around the idea of using fun foam. The wooden bowls could be glued on the lower right of the heart. Red fun foam cut in circles could be glued in the bowls to be the soup, while a white marker could make a heart and some steam from the bowl.

If I used wood for the heart and bowl, then it would have a nicer quality and people may even keep them as a memento as well as a reminder.

The wooden hearts could be painted light blue. Then clear mailing labels could print the "Family Famine: Hunger for Love" logo on the front. Another clear mailing label would list the basic information on the back.

Any leftover pins from the conference could be given to the first people to arrive at the premiere.

Besides the pins, I thought of other fun ways to grab people's attention. At baby showers, I had seen people take a candy bar and cover it with their own wrapper that said something like "It's a Boy!" or "It's a Girl!". The same idea could be used for my premiere. As the wooden bowl with the tomato soup was a key image in the logo, then I could create a label to go around a can of soup.

This could work. . .but not for the conference. If I had 200 cans of soup, that would be heavy.

I think I will stick with the pins.

Until we tell again,

Rachel Hedman

Professional Storyteller

Former Co-Chair of Youth, Educators, and Storytellers Alliance (2005-2008)

Tel: (801) 870-5799
Email: info@rachelhedman.com

URL: http://www.rachelhedman.com

How-To Blog: http://storytellingadventures.blogspot.com

Performance Blog: http://familyfamine.blogspot.com
Other places to find me: Twitter, YouTube, Facebook, LinkedIn, Professional Storyteller

Something Slipped into the Christmas Letters

With the preparation of the holidays as well as the premiere, the annual Christmas letter to family and friends was delayed.

Part of the preparation was for my brother, Nate, who could celebrate Christmas with us.

After the regular festivities relating to Christmas in the morning, the afternoon was a time to relax. I took this time to print and sign the Christmas letters.

As the letters were stuffed in the envelopes, I also placed a "Family Famine: Hunger for Love" postcard. It seemed only appropriate given the the theme of the program. Besides, the back side of the postcard had a picture of me, which is always good to share with relatives in case they forgot what I looked like.

The letter itself talked about my premiere.

When it comes to support, it is best from family and friends.

Until we tell again,

Rachel Hedman

Professional Storyteller

Former Co-Chair of Youth, Educators, and Storytellers Alliance (2005-2008)

Tel: (801) 870-5799
Email: info@rachelhedman.com

URL: http://www.rachelhedman.com

How-To Blog: http://storytellingadventures.blogspot.com

Performance Blog: http://familyfamine.blogspot.com
Other places to find me: Twitter, YouTube, Facebook, LinkedIn, Professional Storyteller